Q: Perhaps maybe a little, uh, Hamlet?
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Oh, I know Hamlet. And what he might say with irony, I say with conviction: "What a piece of work is man! How noble in reason! How infinite in faculty! In form, in moving, how express and admirable! In action, how like an angel! In apprehension, how like a god!"
Q: Surely, you don't see your species like that, do you?
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: I see us one day becoming that, Q. Is it that which concerns you?
Q: May whatever God you believe in...
Q: have mercy on your soul. This court stands adjourned.
Q: Goodbye, Jean-Luc, I'm gonna miss you. You had such potential. But then again, all good things must come to an end.
Picard: Q? What is going on here? Where is the anomaly?
Q: [pretendind to be deaf] Where is your mommy? Well, I don't know.
[Q appears in a monk's costume]
Q: Let us pray, for understanding and for compassion.
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: Let us do no such damn thing! What is this need of yours for costumes, Q? Have you no identity of your own?
Q: I come in search of the truth.
Captain Jean-Luc Picard: You come in search of what humanity is!
Q: I *forgive* your blasphemy!
Capt. Picard: Return that moon to its orbit.
Q: I have no powers! Q the ordinary.
Capt. Picard: Q the liar! Q the misanthrope!
Q: Q the miserable, Q the desperate! What must I do to convince you people?
Lieutenant Worf: Die.
Q: Oh, very clever, Worf. Eat any good books lately?
Counselor Deanna Troi: They made you human as part of your punishment?
Q: No, it was my request. I could have chosen to exist as a Markoffian sea lizard, or a Belzoidian flea - anything I wished, as long as it was mortal. And since I had only a fraction of a second to mull, I chose this, and asked them to bring me here.
Counselor Deanna Troi: Why?
Q: [to Picard] Because in all the universe, you're the closest thing I have to a friend, Jean-Luc.
Q: One creature's torment is another creature's delight.
Q: I know that you're probably asking yourself, "Why would a brilliant, handsome, dashingly omnipotent being like Q want to mate with a scrawny little bipedal specimen like me?"
Captain Janeway: Let me guess: no one else in the universe will have you!
Q: Nonsense! I could have chosen a Klingon Targ; a Romulan empress; a Cyrillian microbe.
Captain Janeway: Really? I beat out a single-celled organism? How flattering!
Capt. Picard: We demonstrated to you that mankind had become peaceful and benevolent. You agreed and you let us go on our way. Now why am I standing here again?
Q: Oh, you'd like me to connect the dots for you, lead you from A to B to C, so that your puny mind could comprehend? How boring.
Q: You see this? This is you. I'm serious! Right here, life is about to form on this planet for the very first time. A group of amino acids are about to combine to form the first protein. The building blocks
Q: of what you call "life." Strange, isn't it? Everything you know, your entire civilization, it all begins right here in this little pond of goo. Appropriate somehow, isn't it? Too bad you didn't bring your microscope; it's really quite fascinating. Oh, look! There they go. The amino-acids are moving closer, and closer, and closer. Aww, nothing happened. See what you've done?
Capt. Picard: Are you saying that it worked? We collapsed the anomaly?
Q: Is that all this meant to you? Just another spatial anomaly, just another day at the office?
Capt. Picard: Did it work?
Q: Well, you're here, aren't you, you're talking to me, aren't you?
Capt. Picard: What about my crew?
Q: [scoffs] The anomaly, my ship, my crew, I suppose you're worried about your fish too. If it puts your mind at ease - you've saved humanity, once again.
Capt. Picard: The last time that I stood here was seven years ago.
Q: Seven years ago? How little do you mortals understand time. Must you be so linear, Jean-Luc?
Capt. Picard: You accused me of being the representative of a barbarous species.
Q: I believe my exact words were "a dangerous, savage, child-race."
Capt. Picard: I sincerely hope that this is the last time that I find myself here.
Q: You just don't get it, do you, Jean-Luc? The trial never ends. We wanted to see if you had the ability to expand your mind to new horizons. And for one brief moment, you did.
Capt. Picard: When I realized the paradox.
Q: Exactly. For that one fraction of a second, you were open to options you had never considered. *That* is the exploration that awaits you. Not mapping stars and studying nebula, but charting the unknown possibilities of existence.
Capt. Picard: Q, what is going on?
Q: I told you. You're dead, this is the afterlife, and I'm God.
Capt. Picard: [laughs scornfully] You are not God!
Q: Blasphemy! You're lucky I don't cast you out, or smite you, or something. The bottom line is, your life ended about five minutes ago under the inept ministrations of Dr. Beverly Crusher.
Capt. Picard: No, I am not dead. Because I refuse to believe that the afterlife is run by you. The universe is not so badly designed.